Shoulding on yourself.

Eww….
How many of our thoughts begin with “I should……….”
I should get more sleep. I should eat better.  I should get more exercise. I should learn to meditate.
I should be thinner, richer, kinder, smarter, more successful, a better friend, parent, co worker.
I should be doing more, having more, being more.

Where did those expectations of behaviors come from?  
How was it decided that those results are important to you and what gives your life meaning and joy?
Despite the constant Should Tape looping in your mind, why is it that so many of those things never happen?

 

The next time the Should Whisperer leans in and tries wielding their Should Stick, pause.  
Take a breath.
Figure out just who or what is actually behind that urging.
What voice from your past, or the media, or self help book, or younger you is fueling the Whisperer’s insistence.

The problem isn’t the actions or the results you’re hoping to achieve.
The problem is in automatically assuming that all those Shoulds will make your life happier, easier, more successful.
Letting go of the Shoulds happens when you consciously decide which things really are important to you.

 

You only have a limited amount of time and energy-where do you want to spend it?
And who do you want to spend it with?

 

Let go of the shoulds that make you feel ewwww….
Decide for yourself, for the life you want to be living now, which actions you want to take.
And begin taking small steps in that direction.
Maybe:
Go to bed fifteen minutes earlier.
Have an apple.
Call a friend and meet for coffee.
Walk around the block at lunch time.
Spend ten minutes in silence on the drive to work.

 

It’s your one true life.
Mindfully choose how you want to be living it.