May we bring wild blessings and fierce love to all we encounter.  Elizabeth Rainey

I have to go to the gym.
I get to experience my strength and stamina.

I have to go to the Holiday Party.
I get to spend time with people I love and don’t see often enough.

I have to participate in the Secret Santa.
I get to surprise someone with a funny and thoughtful gift.

I have to go to work.
I get paid to do something I’m good at and people appreciate.

Self talk and how we frame our experiences 
effects how we feel, and our attitude towards daily experiences.

If there are too many have tos, rethink why you feel they are necessary.
Is it still true?
If it isn’t; permission granted to let those things go.

Try coming from an attitude of gratitude and creativity about how you spend your time.
Make conscious choices that reflect the life you want to be living.

​

You can’t change the past.
No.  
Really, you can’t.

No amount of rehashing, rethinking, what iffing, replaying the conversation, 
blaming, playing the victim, or brilliant come back you’ve now thought of
will change what happened a minute, month or years ago.

It is perfectly okay, legitimate and a good idea to consider the consequences
of past actions.
But only if you let what you learned from the situation inform how you might
respond now.

Get out of the past.
Be present with who and what is going on in your life today.
Right now.
Minimize the time you spend looking in your personal rear view mirror.
You’re not going that way.

(Clearing mental clutter is as important as clearing physical space)

“Gift-giving is an important ritual of happiness: it strengthens connections, allows us to express love, thoughtfulness, and appreciation, and gives us a way to be generous.”  Gretchen Rubin

​Just a tiny reminder: 
Make sure the gifts you give don’t end up as clutter in someone else’s life.
(Think:  Experiences, sharing time, things that will get used up)

Thoughtful gift giving enriches the experience for the giver and the receiver.

Feeling overwhelmed by a project?

Start exercising?
Clear a counter?
Organize your desk?
Park in the garage?

Forget the big picture.
​Narrow your focus.
Think of one step you can do today to move you forward.

Walk to the corner.
Throw away the trash on the counter.
Put all the pens and pencils in one container.
Donate the sports equipment you’re not using.

Often just starting is the most daunting step.
The goal for today isn’t completion.
The focus of today is one step; moving you in the direction you want to go.

Tomorrow, another step.
Let momentum and progress carry you forward.

What one thing can you do today,
with the energy you have,
and the time that’s available,
to begin the project?
Take that step.

 Make a list; check it twice.

Make a list:
Gift list.
Grocery list. 
Commitments list.  

Stop trying to keep track of everything in your head.
Write it down.

Written lists help insure that we shop with a purpose and a plan, 
we buy what we need, 
and we show up when and where we’re invited.

Getting things out of our heads and down on paper (or digitally noted)
makes keeping track of things easier.

Check the list twice:  
Or three times, 
or until everything is crossed off.
Carry the list with you.  
A list can’t help you if leave it on the counter and you’re in the store. 

(I’ve found that keeping  lists on my phone makes it easy to add items,
and I don’t have to worry about losing the piece of paper)

Lists mean crossing out!  Or deleting, if we’re doing it digitally.
A completed list or an empty note folder is a small but significant reward,
and reinforces that we can be in control of our time and money.

Sometimes clutter is a result of feeling scattered and overwhelmed 
about all we think we need to be doing and having in our lives.
Lists remind us what we need to be doing, 
help us focus, and remind us what we’ve chosen as our priorities.

Cut yourself some slack.

LIfe is challenging and hard, and sometimes we just need to 
ease up on ourselves.

Lower the expectation of all we should be doing
and just focus on what we can do, today.

Try talking to yourself in the same compassionate way
you’d talk to a friend who was dealing with a challenge.

Our default is usually judgement and criticism;
both of ourselves and others.
Make kindness your first option-
for yourself
and for those around you.

Things will change.
They always and inevitably do.
By offering kindness we will make the transition between now and then
less of a struggle.

Use the gift soap.
Burn the nice candle.
Spray on the cologne.
Wear the new sweater.
Eat the expensive chocolate.
Upgrade to the room with a view.

It’s okay for you to have and use nice things.
Stop saving the good stuff to use someday.
(or to give to someone else)

Treat yourself. 
It’s okay.
Really.

 “Turn your focus from something don’t want to something you do want.
This allows you to shift your energy from complaining to taking action.”  Tiny Buddha 

This suggestion can apply in many areas of our lives, 
 especially when it comes to dealing with clutter.
By not getting caught in the endless and berating stories of 
“My house is such a disaster.
 I’m so disorganized.
The kid’s room is a mess.”, 
and instead focus on:
“I find my keys when I need them. 
We sit at the table and have dinner as a family.
The the kid’s room is reasonably tidy.”
we begin to articulate what it is we do want.

Stop using your thoughts and energy to complain, 
and start taking action. 

Bemoaning your lack of organization isn’t helpful to you or the situation.  
Designating a specific place for your keys to live and putting them there every time you come home, 
is a positive action, and good use of your energy.
Setting up a place to deal with the mail, instead of piling it on the table,
is a specific action that will leave the table clear for family dining.
Spending ten minutes before bed helping your kid put away their toys is an action 
that will lead to their rooms being reasonably tidy.

Choose one spot in our house that you feel is cluttered.  
Think of three things you could do, actions you could take that could clear the space. 
Small, easy actions: Toss a paper into recycle.
Take something to the other room where it has a home.
Throw something away.
​ 
.Stop just thinking.  
Start doing.

If the project or task seems overwhelming:  Focus on what you CAN do.

Is the whole closet too daunting?
  Just sort one shelf.
The kitchen counter piled high?
  Just fill and run the dishwasher.
A mountain of unopened mail?
  Just toss the junk mail.
A pile of dirty clothes on the chair?
  Just run one load.

Try for small wins.
One step in the direction you want to go.
A single action is movement.  
Movement creates momentum.

Change happens one decision, one action at a time.
You don’t have to do it all today.
You just need to start.

Find one thing you can do.
Do that one thing.